Sir Godfrey Gregg
My Personal Reflections
If you feel that your feelings are snowballing and preoccupying more and more of your time, if your relationships are less than satisfying, consider getting help now rather than later. As someone who was unaware that her abandonment issues had been misdirecting her life for years, I would want you to avoid this same fate. What if I had known all this information yesteryear? Would it have made a difference? Well, I am here to help only if you are willing to listen and take note. I’ve since learned that life can be much richer and more fulfilling with a little help from my therapist. And I wish the same for you.
Abandonment issues aren’t always easy to recognize
Of course, it can sometimes take several relationships to recognize a pattern, and even longer to resolve it–if at all. (This is why psychotherapy can interrupt old patterns and help you learn new ways of being with your partner). Here everyone comes under scrutiny since there is a personal relationship between you and your therapist. Now you see where TRUST comes to play. There are so many things you see in a relationship from the outside that is not visible from the inside. You will need help to resolve some serious issues in your relationship if you want to stay on track.
They might explain for instance why some folks choose a spouse for whom they have no strong feelings. By trading emotional attachment for security, at least they’ll feel in control over their fears of abandonment. Maybe a good idea, but doesn’t always work and before long some ugly fear is going to show it’s head. Many men suffered trauma with their wife when they gained weight and the wife has a trust issue when the husband is working late. She doesn’t see the benefit of extra money for servicing the home. What she sees is the unfaithfulness of her husband. There is where the trouble starts in the relationship. The man will not understand what is going on because of the hidden fears of abandonment in the wife. This can trigger the man to want to spend more time away from home and the troubles increase. Unfortunately, it can take years before a person realizes the consequences of their decision.